"Will you not take what your god Chemosh gives you? Likewise, whatever the LORD our God has given us, we will possess." Judges 11: 24
I have taken much time to ponder on what I'm about to write, for it is both a critique against a certain ideology that pervades Christendom, and at once an encouragement to those burdened by this belief. I have grown up in a culture that imbues one with pessimism, guilt, shame, condemnation--and a constant fear that God will rip everything from your hand, and like clay, beat you into submission for his glory...a maniac? loving father? Which one is he? Now I can already perceive many of you trying to quell within the words I'm writing. To one it is: "How dare you mere mortal speak of God that way?" and to another, "You're such a fantastic moron--a bold imbecile to challenge of God, nor has he not told Job to quiet, to not question God...who are you?" And many other derivatives of such a statement. My answer is simply this: Hear me out.
To make the ground clear, I speak not against the notion of the correction of God--that life is brutal, and we encounter trials, some that come out of nowhere, some we bring upon ourselves, and others that come and go on a consistent basis. As a Christian we are indeed called to grow and mature--as a matter of fact, I who write this have much to do in that area and in many others: as a man, a lover, student, brother, friend, and etc. Further, indeed, to grow includes pain, that we shed our skin--which is no easy feat, nor an easy journey. Indeed, as we are ignorant creatures there comes a time where we must be corrected--be it from ignorance (simply not knowing) or incredulity (knowing and still doing.) I affirm all of the aforementioned statements. God calls for growth, he seeks to help us grow, therefore we indeed grow. However, the Christian church even in this point has failed---it has failed on many other points. For starters, a constant gospel filled with shame and perfectionism, a gospel of lack, a gospel that is detached from helping one another, a gospel that is unrealistic in its preachings, and worse of all, a God that is infact no God at all. James Baldwin once said, "If the concept of God has any validity or any use, it can only be to make us larger, freer, and more loving. If God cannot do this, then it is time we got rid of him." The history of Christianity shows a conception of God that is brutal--from "condoning" slavery, "condoning" bigotry, "condoning" not loving one's neighbor, "condoning" Jim Crow, "condoning" the brutalization of men and women, "condoning" the murder of those of a different religion, and "condoning" the justifying saying that leads to shedding of senseless blood: he-is-not-in-my-denominationism. Our expression of who God is, in all honesty has been tainted--for we preach a God of brimstone and fire, rife with justice, overfilled with anger, seeking to blow up on anyone at any falling. We too preach a God, I too preach a God that is not of what I speak against, in my daily living each time I sin, commit a wrong act, hurt another human being, and act contrary to what is right.
This must change and so must I; so much we. I am not here to debate further on that point, perhaps in a later essay I might, but I'm zoning in on a particular thought, a particular doctrine which seeks to grasp Christians in a state of torment, despair, and existentialist domain. A fear that God is always seeking to take from us, a fear that the blessings of God are set before us like a trap, and when we delve into them...woosh...just like that it is whisked away. I do not speak here of prosperity gospel, for it is not true that we shall have an enjoyable life, nor do we pray for money, and it is given to us...nor that as Christians we are to be rich, all of us. The life of a Christian is marked by purpose, that we have a purpose in life, whatever sphere that is in, be it in medicine, industry, construction and yes, even the garbage man/woman. I also reject the notion that we are to live an ascetic life--a life where we seclude ourselves, depriving it of everything--for those who can of course, but it is not a moral obligation, nor a thing which we ought to do. There is indeed the case of detachment, mirroring the stoic philosophy of the realization that we only have the things within our power under our control---and to extrapolate to the Christian sphere, that everything we are/have been given are not to replace God, or are not to in clear language, "MAKE OUR HEADS BIG." We have now arrived at a place where we have to ask...where is this leading?
We often cut ourselves short--daily the sermon is detachment, and that God takes away, and that everything is an idol--to the point where I believe even faith has now become an idol. True detachment does not mean we ignore what we have, on the contrary we should enjoy it more, in a pure state, doing it all for God's glory, or to the glory of God. A point in case is sex, a married couple engaging in this activity ought to enjoy it--it is a gift, a play, a dance, a joining of two souls on a romantic-intimate orchestra, and the exchanging of the love between two people as passionate as can be physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. Now that we have established that, I must say that we simply are given things by God, and our anxieties lead us to wasting it. We may have a gift to sing, and our anxiety drives it to nought. We may have great intelligence in finance, yet a fear of "God said money is bad," drives us away from it. We may be blessed, indeed blessed, with a great potential spouse and our anxiety and worry of "EH God is probably testing me," drives it away. Case being, we seem to have taken every blessing given, or most as every is unrealistic, and detached so far from it that it becomes a snare, or a pain--an entrapment. The case and point being, whatever God has given you, give it your all. I have come to this realization after hearing a sermon yesterday--if God has blessed you with something, yes, it is good to not think of it as an end-all be all, not devote so much time that God has been forgotten--rather, work on it, devote time, and live within it. Afterall, that blessing God has given you is probably to aid you on your journey of purpose.
I have realized one thing, that many Christians seem to fear pleasure--of course I speak not of wanton pleasure, but pleasure in general; to laugh, to love, to feel--it is as if we walk daily with a cloud of "trials and tribulations." From whence do we get this gospel, I AM NOT SURE. I shall leave you with this quote from Malcom X, "The white man has taught us to shout and sing and pray until we die, to wait until death, for some dreamy heaven-in-the-hereafter, when we're dead, while this white man has his milk and honey in the streets paved with golden dollars right here on this earth!" To have Christ is to not cease to live, but to be fueled in living; to have Christ is not a matter of being baptized in despair and constant sorrow. Life is difficult there is no doubt; it is akin to walking in a field mixed with thorns and flowers, at times we can enjoy the sight of a beautiful lily, and at other times we are constantly pricked--and if pricked, do we not bleed? However, God does not seek for life to be a constant gloom--a constant depression. We ought to live life indeed, we ought to follow principles indeed--but let us be mindful of these maxims and beliefs, for a maxim that is freeing, may also entrap. We ought to live, we ought to work and build, all the while we praise God and put him first.
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